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双城记&两地书 ②丨美国大学副校长与母亲的来信

来源: 交汇点   作者:付岩岩  2018-05-14 15:38:44

  有这样一群人,他们从家乡小城出发,像纪伯伦诗歌里所描述的那样,成为母亲这把弓射的又快又远的箭,飞向更远的远方。

  纽约、伦敦、多伦多、普林斯顿,曾经的远方现在已成为他们生活多年的城市,他们在这些城市学习、工作、娶妻生子,可无论走多远,他们始终走不出母亲的注视,他们始终眷恋着人生旅途的起点、母亲生养自己的地方。

  在这个母亲节,他们望着家乡的方向,提笔写下一封给母亲的情书,抒写在另一座城的生活,也抒写对家城的眷恋;而多年不写字的母亲们也重拾纸笔,诉说孩子们离开后家里的变化,也诉说想念。

  在这个母亲节,他们用书信这种古老的方式来表达思念、沟通和情谊,把最温暖的一束阳光重新照进内心深处那个最柔软的角落。

  而今天,母亲节虽已经过去,但是爱的表达,还在延续。

  人物简介

  刘骏,江苏常熟人,现任美国纽约石溪大学副校长、终身教授、博导,是世界级应用语言专家,目前还兼任世界英语教学研究基金会副会长、世界汉语学会副会长及国家汉办高级顾问等。

  他曾担任过佐治亚州立大学副校长、亚利桑那大学助理副校长、英语系主任和孔院院长。在他担任的众多职务中,他最看重的是在美国顶尖大学出任英语系主任。这如同一个外国人在国内985大学担任中文系主任一般,有多难,不言而喻。

  2017年5月20日,作为海外嘉宾,刘骏还应邀出席了在南京召开的首届江苏发展大会,与来自全球的1213位精英大咖为江苏发展献计献策。

  亲爱的妈妈:

  祝您母亲节快乐!

  母亲节到了,我还是忙忙碌碌,总有做不完的事。记得上次给您写信还是多年前我没买手机的时候。这么多年过去,每次问您想要什么礼物,您总是说什么都不要,这次母亲节,想送您点不一样的礼物,写封信给您。

  我来美国二十多年了。虽然早已习惯了西方的文化和饮食起居,但是在每一个梦醒的时候,对家乡的思念总会缠绕心间,家乡有时候是我年少时您给我织的毛衣,有时候是记忆中您做的红烧肉和茭白毛豆子的味道,这种最美最香的味道好久没有吃到了。

  最近期末工作有点忙,又到了每年的申请录取季,总是接到很多来美留学的孩子发来的咨询信息,从学业到生活,孩子们问得很细致,毕竟留学对很多家庭来说依旧是件大事,很可能关系到一个人甚至一个家庭的命运。前一段时间遇到一个叫莫天池的留学生,因为儿时的一场医疗事故罹患脑瘫,不能活动,只能在爸爸的陪读下来我校攻读博士学位,这个不幸但又努力的孩子触动到了我,留学并不仅仅是拿到一张海外镀金的文凭,同时也撑起了天池和他全家的梦,我得尽我最大的可能帮助他们,让这个有梦的孩子翅膀不会折断。其实这也是受了你们的影响。您和爸爸在常熟省中教了一辈子的书,记得你们对学生总是特别爱护,特别照顾,就像自己的孩子一般。

  在美国的这些年,每次碰到这些初来乍到的年轻人,我的脑海中总是一遍遍如电影般回放自己当年的样子。只有40美元的我睡过教堂,打过工,为了能完成学业,为了自己的梦想,不停地努力拼搏着。幸运的是,我成功了。每次看到他们,我都感觉自己似乎又找回了年轻时的影子,而也正是那段经历让我选择了做国际合作交流和留学生服务工作,来帮助留学生们圆梦。当然,他们中的大部分人比我当初要幸运的多,我们的祖国改革开放四十年来,经济得到了飞速的发展,人们的生活水平和生活质量也得到了极大的提升。只带40美元来美国对他们而言是不可思议的。开学季,我总能看到他们的爸妈陪同着他们一起开开心心地入学,在校园里留影合照,那个时候我会遗憾,当年我入学的时候,您和爸爸没能够陪我一起过来。但我也不后悔,毕竟你们是那样的爱我,是那样的心疼我,如果知道我当年的窘境,怕是要流泪了。

  前几天有一个学生问我,这么多年在美国,取得了这么多为人称道的成绩,有没有什么事是自己遗憾的。我想了想,我最大的遗憾就是漂泊在外的我太少回家了,太少关心您和爸爸了。初到美国的十年,学业很重,压力也很大,回家团聚被我放在了脑后。可是您从来没有说过什么,也从来不肯打扰我,只是定期打电话来,还会被我匆匆挂掉。现在的我人生走到中年,做了父亲,孩子也恰巧到了我当年任性闯荡的年纪,这个时候我才明白该是怎样的一种爱才能让你们放下对我常常不回家的抱怨。当大多数同龄人陪伴父母颐养天年时,我却在遥远的国外,只能留给你们一份牵挂。每当想到这些,我真的是很内疚很心痛。现在的我虽然也会偶尔回家,也会常常跟您电话、视频,但那些错过的时光,终究补不回来了……

  妈妈,您和爸爸会怪我吗?又是一年母亲节到了,其实除了这一天,天天都应该是母亲节,因为天天都有我们母子说出来和没说出来的爱,以后我一定安排好时间常常回家,陪伴爸爸和您,也盼望你们能来这里生活。

  愿您和爸爸在家一切顺心,身体康健!我爱你们!

  儿:骏

  2018.5.8

  Dear mom,

  Happy Mother’s Day!

  Mother’s Day is approaching, on which I will be just as busy as any other day. You always tell me not to buy you any gift, so this year, I will do something special. I’m writing this letter to you as a gift. Last time when I write a letter with a pen, I hadn’t owned a cellphone yet.

  It’s been over 20 years since I came to America, with the western lifestyle already a part of my life. However, every morning I wake up with those tiny little bits about Changshu, my hometown. I would think of the sweaters you handmade for me when I was young, and the homemade dishes – the best delicacies in my memory.

  The application season has always been busy. I receive a lot of enquiries from Chinese students who want to pursue study in America. While answering their questions and solving their problems, I feel my responsibility to help them as much as I can. I attribute this to the influence from you and father. You dedicated your lives to teaching and to students. In my memory, you always took care of them like they are your own kids.

  Those young students also remind me of my early years in America. I came here with only $40. To make a living I had slept in church and done much part-time work. I seized every minute to realize my dream. And I am just so lucky that I made it.

  The tough years made up my mind to help the international students to realize their dreams in America. Unlike me, they bring much more than only $40, thanks to rapid social development in China. Their parents would come to the school opening with them, too. Sometimes that makes me feel lost. How nice it would be if you and father could also come to my school opening! But I feel nothing inferior, because I have so much love from you.

  A few days ago, I was asked whether there is anything I regret about during all these years. I thought about the question and said my biggest regret was that I spent too little time with you and father.

  In the early years here, with heavy academic pressure, I hardly had any time to think about going home. And you never gave me any pressure, even though you missed me terribly. It was only in these years, when my own child left home, can I feel how open-minded and generous you were that you held back all the complaints when I was not by your side.

  In recent years I visit you more often, and we can talk more through phone and video chat. However, the lost years can never be found again. Will you and father blame me for that?

  Another Mother’s Day is coming. We praise maternal love on this day, and every day else, because love is always around us, everyday and everywhere.

  I promise I will visit home more often. And I hope that you can move here and live with us one day.

  Wish you and father all the best. I love you.

  Love, Jun

  2018.5.8

  骏儿:

  信已收到!看着你熟悉的笔迹和那些心里话,想着这是你给我母亲节最好的礼物,妈妈倍感开心和幸福!

  回想你在国外的这些年,妈妈的心里大概只有一个感受——骄傲。那个清晨捧书朗诵的小男孩成了顶天立地的男子汉,那个带着40美元为梦想只身闯美国的少年成了专业的外语教学专家,妈妈真是非常自豪啊!

  时间真快。在你刚去的十年,虽然你不曾说,我们也大概猜到你在那边的一些情况。一个人在国外有多辛苦,我和你爸爸都知道。那时候我们也确实心疼过,但一想到这是你的选择,是你的梦想,我们支持你。那时候我们很少提起要你回家,怕我们的要求影响到你。我们知道你从小就对语言表现出了天赋,可能是受你爸爸的影响,你对英语的痴迷程度超过了我们的想象,那个时候我们就在想,是什么样的机会能让你把这份兴趣变成自己酷爱的事业呢?应该就是在你决定去美国的时候我们看到了你的雄心壮志。

  现在的你虽然和爸爸妈妈相比依旧年富力强,但毕竟也不是二十几岁的小伙子了。抛开你的工作,妈妈想跟你说说心里话。妈妈知道你有多负责,去年章莹颖失踪案出来后,看到在留学圈中弥漫着的恐慌情绪,你说你一定要为大家做些事。于是你特别在学校开通了24小时热线,还成立了中国中心,为中国留学生提供法律等各方面的咨询援助。就像你说的,每一个留学生的背后都系着一个家,你要在做好研究、教学工作的同时尽可能多的帮助大家。那段时间你很忙,电话中透露出疲惫,妈妈很想说儿子你要爱护自己的身体啊,但话到嘴边又收了回去,你小时候身体不好,我们总是拦着你不让你剧烈运动,幸而你是个有主见的孩子,找到了适合自己的锻炼方式,爬虞山看日出读英语,给自己练就了一副还算不错的身子骨。但是再能干的铁人也有累的时候,我是你的妈妈,比起你的事业,我更关心你的身体。你已不年轻了,要注意自己的身体,毕竟我们需要一个健康的你。

  这几年你回家的次数渐渐多了些,特别是省中校庆的时候,你还专门写了文章来说说我们这“省中一家”,那些连我们都忘记的小事一件件鲜活地存在你的记忆里,可见你对家的热爱和依恋比我们想象得要深,盼着你有机会常回家看看,我们在家等着你。

  时刻想念你的妈妈

  2018.5.10

  Dear Jun,

  I have received your letter. The words from your heart in your handwriting is the best Mother’s Day gift ever! I feel so happy!

  When I recall the years when you are away from home, I feel so proud of you. The little boy who used to do morning reading everyday has grown up to a real man. With only $40, you realized your dream and become a professor! Words cannot tell how proud I am.

  Time flies. Your father and I know that your early years in America were not easy although you didn’t tell us. We were heartbroken by the difficulties you met. But we had to let you go, because it was your dream. You showed great interest in language, especially English. We were wondering how you could turn your interest to a career. When you decided to go to America, we found the answer.

  Although you are a young man in our eyes, we must see the truth that you are in your mid-age now. Please do take care of your health.

  Last year, the disappearance of Zhang Yingying triggered panic among international students. You did a lot to offer legal consultation for Chinese students. When we talked over the phone at that time, I can feel the fatigue in your voice. I’m happy that my competent son can help others, but as your mother, I care about your health more than anything else.

  You visit home more often these years. When your mother school celebrated the founding anniversary in March this year, you even wrote an article, in which we were surprised to read about the tiny details we already forgot. I think this is because you love your hometown more than anyone else. Please come home more often. We’re always here for you.

  Always miss you.

  Mom

  2018.5.10

刘骏与母亲合影

  Now君有话说

  知道刘骏是去年在南京召开的首届江苏发展大会,他和美国工程院院士、微软全球执行副总裁沈向洋,新东方教育集团董事长俞敏洪他们站在一起,意气风发。这次看到他给母亲的信件,才发现这个我们眼中的成功人士也有柔软的一面,他会在每一个梦醒的时候想念母亲给儿时的自己织的毛衣,想起母亲烧的红烧肉和茭白毛豆。

  当年,刘骏独自来美国闯荡,只有40美元的他睡过教堂,打过工,怕母亲担心,从来不会告诉母亲这些。现在刘骏的孩子也到了他当年闯荡的年纪,刘骏在信中说,现在才明白该是怎样的一种爱才能让母亲放下对他常常不回家的抱怨。

  刘骏的母亲在回信中,也是对儿子满满的心疼和骄傲,心疼他一个人在国外的辛苦,却又骄傲他所做的一切,如去年章莹颖失踪案出来后,刘骏特别在学校开通了24小时热线,成立了中国中心,为中国留学生提供法律等各方面的咨询援助。

  刘骏在信的末尾说,一定安排好时间常回家陪爸妈,刘骏母亲回信说等你回家,这平凡而又温暖的一句等你回家也是所有母亲想对子女说的。我们,都常回家看看吧。

  交汇点记者 付岩岩

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